Sweet Treats: Playing (Sexy) with your Food
Chocolate covered strawberries, whipped cream, chocolate sauce, peanut butter… food has always held an erotic connection to sexual pleasure. Perhaps feeling satisfied in one area (mouth) leads to satisfaction in another. Or it may be that attending to the sense of taste and the sweet enjoyment of certain foods leads to arousal of other senses, awakening our desire for further things that we experience as pleasurable.
It’s like an orgasm in my mouth…
The taste of food can provide great amounts of pleasure as anyone who has ever uttered the above expression can attest. Food and sex are similar: we need them to survive, but we also just plain enjoy them. We need food to live, but we also derive much pleasure from eating certain treats. Sex may be necessary for reproduction, but the act of sex can provide sensations of bliss and satiety.
For a variety of reasons, many people use food as a way to enhance romance and add variety and excitement to their sex play. It’s flirtatious, romantic, and has a sexual connotation. Additionally, the ecstatic moans when tasting something delicious may sound similar to sexual groaning and pleasure. Whatever your taste, below are some things to sample and some things to avoid!
In or Out?
Consider using honey, whipped cream, chocolate or caramel sauce on the breasts, belly, back, thighs, fingers, testicles, penis, legs, feet and toes. There’s plenty of body space to explore, while also keeping food away from the vagina and anus.
Food that contains sugar can throw off the PH balance of the vagina, which can lead to yeast infections in women. In addition, cucumbers were not designed for the rectum. How do we know? They don’t have a flared base (for easy removal) like butt plugs do. Avoid an embarrassing trip to Carle’s emergency department: if you want to insert something, buy a sex toy!
Also, the oils contained in food products like peanut butter or chocolate sauce can break down the latex of a condom or other latex barrier. While it may be fun to drizzle chocolate over your lover’s penis, make sure you do a good job licking it all off before putting the condom on. Or, if you’re using a product with oil as a way to enhance oral sex with a condom, simply use a new condom when you penetrate.
Succulent Seduction
The ways that the mouth is used to eat, suck, lick and envelop the food, can bring up similarities to oral sex. By inserting a banana, popsicle or carrot into your mouth, you could simulate fellatio and tease your partner. Finding food to use to simulate cunnilingus (oral sex for women) may be more challenging. Here’s our suggestion: take a piece of fleshy fruit (peach, pear, kiwi) and cut it in half, enjoying in front of your partner the sweet nectar.
Fingers, toes, nipples and many other places are also filled with nerve endings. Sucking or licking juices or syrups off of the fingers or licking in-between your partner’s fingers can both simulate oral sex and increase sensations not focused on genitals.
Additionally, some people get turned on by feeding their partners, watching them as they enjoy tasty treats like strawberries or whipped cream. Sharing food implies intimacy, and feeding each other is a way to give each other pleasure. You can also eat together as foreplay. Go to dinner first, and savor the meal while anticipating the sexual experiences that might come later (whether that is a kiss goodnight, or intercourse). In this way, potential lovers may eat more sensually, licking their lips or rolling their eyes in pleasure, as they share their fudge brownie dessert.
Put it on ice
Putting ice in your mouth and giving oral sex, or rubbing it along your partner’s body is an easy, safe way to explore new sensations. Not only is it water soluble, it won’t leave a sticky residue! You can also try using ice during masturbation, rubbing it on your body including your genitals to heighten sensations.
But I’m not hungry…
As with all sexual play, check in to make sure you & your partner are actually enjoying fun with food. Sometimes we re-create what we’re told is sexy and sensual, even if it doesn’t work for us. Just because we see scenes where lovers are sharing chocolate covered strawberries naked on a blanket in the middle of a flowered field, doesn’t mean we have to create this in our own relationships. You might find mixing food with sex is messy, sticky and a turn off! On the other hand, re-creating scenes that we do find sexy, romantic or sensual, can add new sparks to our sex lives!
There’s a lot of focus in our society on our sex lives, making them better, adding spice and flavor. We don’t want to fall into the same trap. Most likely, your sex life is good enough! Enjoy it for what it is, however it looks or tastes.
Join us next week as we talk more about “good enough” sex. Until then, keep doin’ it well!
Sex 411: Cooking for a Spicy Time
Try out these sensual cookbooks, or just use your senses to guide you!
Brown: The Seduction Cookbook
Kaupp: The Erotic Cookbook
Reiley: Fork Me, Spoon Me: The Sensual Cookbook
Kim Rice and Ross Wantland are professionals in the fields of sexuality and violence prevention. Email them at buzzdoinitwell@yahoo.com
